Six Months/Garage Sale 8-2/8-3-12
Yesterday was Thursday August 2nd 2012. This marked yet another week and now 6
months since Kathryn passed away.
Now I know why I was hit with the sick bug yesterday. It seems that my strong emotions can
really take me down. I wasn’t even
aware of being so upset but I must have been. After going through things in the garage and coming across
so many things that Kathryn made I guess it got to me. So yesterday I woke around 4 am and had
a really bad headache. I took some
prescription pain meds and went back to bed. I got up around 6:30 with the same headache and thought a
shower would help. I felt dizzy
and nocuous in the shower and shortly after getting out I got sick. Nothing in my tummy so it was that
nasty stomach acid stuff. My Mom
came down to spend the day with me and we both just laid around and watched the
Olympics. I ate some crackers and
had some 7-up around 1pm when my tummy finally felt like it could handle
something.
Before I went to sleep last night I was sitting up in bed
watching the end of a show (4 weddings).
As I sat there I imagined Kathryn sitting next to me as she would
sometimes. I put my arm out and
around as if it were around her and rubbed the bed as if I were rubbing her
little hand. She probably would have been there with me watching this show if
she were here on Earth. But she
isn’t.
Last night I had weird dreams about Kathryn. Very vivid in my mind too. We were going through her things for
the garage sale but I couldn’t let anything go. There were cute little brightly striped boots. There were dresses and jewelry. Everything was reminding me of special
times with her. Then we were
picking out outfits (My Mom was doing it mainly) for a viewing. At least that was what it seemed like
it was for. And it was as if there
were going to be many viewings. We
had to pick out four outfits. We
were also in charge of preparing her and my Mom was fixing her eyelashes. Only
she was trimming them and I had her stop.
It was so real. You know
how sometimes you can’t really remember dreams, well this time I can replay it
in my mind at will.
I also want to thank all of you who donated to Rowan. The amount donated has really gone up
since I asked for help. Thank you
so very much.
http://www.giveforward.com/rowanscancerfund If you would like
to donate to Rowan here is the link.
Today (Friday) I took Princess to Chambers Bay for a walk
but she started to limp so my friends stayed with her while I got the car. When I got home I started to
gather things for the garage sale.
I went through stuff in Kathryn’s room. I had to remind myself that it is all just stuff. Still I couldn’t get rid of a lot of
things just yet. Many of the
things bring back memories of us shopping together. We had lots of shopping dates. She had so many shoes too. Just like me. I
couldn’t take them all out of her room.
I guess I don’t want to see her room empty. I also reminded myself that this is all for Rowan and
Kathryn would be happy that her stuff will help fund Rowan’s treatment.
Maybe I will dream better dreams about Kathryn tonight. I’m off to continue setting up for the
sale. Hope there is a small person
who comes by and wants to buy a bunch of clothes.
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