Twenty First Birthdays
7-10-12
I started with
my walk at 7am. Came home, read the
paper and took another walk with Princess. I started banana bread and laundry and then headed out to my
friend’s house to help her with some yard work. While doing yard work I started to cry thinking of
Kathryn. I tell you, it is not
getting easier. It seems to be
harder. I think it is because it
is becoming more and more real.
My mind use to make me believe she was coming home and now I really know
that she is not coming home.
I came home and painted. While painting I cried too. I think Klyde misses Kathryn too. He seems bored and wants attention. If Kathryn were here she would be
playing with him. I feel sorry for
him so I try to give him attention.
I looked in the cabinet above the desk last night and found
our Christmas card and letter.
Kathryn had written the letter and part of what she said was that she
was turning 21 this year and it will be a big deal. Yes, turning 21 is a big deal. It was a big birthday for Richard too (25) and I had just
turned 50. It was suppose to be a
very special year for all of us.
We did celebrate my birthday really big. Even though Kathryn passed away just three days before her
21st birthday we still celebrated. She would have loved the party we had for her. Unfortunately we didn’t get to
celebrate Richard’s as big as I would have liked to.
Matt (the boy Kathryn was dating) is turning 21 today
(7-11-12). We were in Mexico at
this time last year. Kathryn and I
spent one morning, while Scott and Richard went golfing or fishing, shopping
for Matt’s birthday present. We
had to look and look and dicker with prices to get the perfect gift. Kathryn did a great job of making the
deal. When we came home she and
Matt celebrated his birthday.
I went walking again today and as my friend shared a story
with me about a man whose son died in his sleep and how now this man has stage
3 tongue cancer I felt again lucky.
I’m not saying I have it easy but I know that I was able to share time
with Kathryn and tell her that I loved her. Scott, Richard and I are all healthy and doing well. We have a comfortable life. I am lucky.
After walking I went to the hospital to visit a friend who
was hit by a car last week. Her son was friends with Kathryn. She is
doing fine and very fortunate that she doesn’t have more serious injuries. She said God was with her and watching
out for her. She also said she was
praying for the person who hit her.
She said he had to be filled with grief. I can’t imagine what he must be thinking after hitting
someone with a car and then just taking off. Hopefully he comes forward so he can heal too. I’m so glad I went to visit her.
I came home and painted. I used the same brush that Kathryn used to paint her room in
Bellingham. She painted it in
October of 2011. Yes, just a
couple of weeks before she was given the bad news. She painted with her left hand as her right hand was not
working well for her. She was
determined to keep doing what she wanted to do. She wasn’t about to let the right hand issue keep her
down. She never gave up. I thought about her as I held that
brush. She even picked out a good
brush to use. I must say that when
I saw her paint job it was very well done. I was proud of her.
A pretty good day.
Only a few tears while painting.
Good Night
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