About Me

Kathryn Bradley was born on 2/5/91 and given a Hawaiian name Kahiwalani meaning "Gift From Heaven" She has been a special gift from the day she was born.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Rain Rain Go Away 5-1-12


Rain Rain Go Away 5-1-12

Wow did it rain today.  It rained from the sky and it rained tears too.  Both Scott and I had cry sessions.  I don’t know why they just happen and why they come at certain times but they do.  I just have to get use to it. 

I met with a lady this morning and I shared with her about Kathryn because we were discussing weight.  I have put on a few pounds.  The stress has added onto my girly figure a few extra curves that don’t belong on my body.  She shared that she lost a good friend in her mid thirties to cervical cancer.  Her friend passed away in March.  She drove all the way to Squiem every weekend for many weeks to visit her friend.  That’s a commitment.  Her friend went one year without a pap and this is what happened.  The darn cancer just snuck in and took her life that quickly.  It is a lesson to learn.  Don’t let your check ups go.  So she and I shared a box of kleenex. 

After that I went to see my friend Robyn.  I promised I would work on painting her bedroom for her.  And now is a great time since it is raining and raining.  I took a look at what was in store for me.  I think I can do the whole thing in one day.  Hopefully I can do it in one day.  If not two days.  So, tomorrow I will get there at 9 am and get started.  My Mom is next on my list.  I will be helping her repair some scraps and bangs from my Dad’s wheel chair and then paint.  That will be a couple of days. 

We also went to visit Robyn’s Aunt who is in the hospital with an abscess on her bowel.  I felt so bad for her.  I’m glad we went to visit and on the way out I asked about what they had her on.  Just checking to make sure they had her on pain and antinausea meds.  They did.  She really needed rest so we didn’t stay long.

I have also been thinking about the WWU Relay for Life.  I have been asked to be the speaker at it.  I have been really thinking a lot about what I should say.  There’s so much to say but I don’t want to bore anyone.  What point or points should I make?  Of course I will speak about Kathryn but to what extent?  There are good things to mention and of course the fact that Cancer Sucks and it took her life.  We have a long way to go still.  We need to save people without giving them things that create more cancer.  This is too common and it has been just accepted as something that happens.  Usually the secondary cancer is deadly from what I have seen.  Some survive but not enough.  I have a lot to think about before the relay. 

I also met with the rep for the yearbook.  You see that is part of my job at school is to create the yearbook.  The rep has really stepped up.  He has spend a tremendous number of hours in my classroom helping my subs get things done so we would have a half way descent yearbook.  All deadlines have been met so far and only one left.  Without his help no deadlines would have been met.  What a great guy.  He spent a couple of hours with me today too.  We looked at an alternative way to do the yearbook for next year.  After spending so much time in my classroom with my old computers he really thinks this new way would be so much faster, easier and less frustrating.  I like that Idea.  He also gave me a bunch of websites that I could use to learn how to use photoshop better.  So many great ideas!.  We may pay a little bit more for this company but you do get what you pay for.  The support he gave us this past year has been worth every extra penny and thousands more. 

I’m excited for next year with the new program. 

I smell Kathryn right now.  I love this smell because I know it is her.  I loved and still love her so much.  Again I have said that I am lucky to have Richard who is so caring and loving.  My Dad had said something long ago.  It was after I had Richard and before I had Kathryn.  He said, “You have to have a second child.”  He said, “ I don’t mean this in a negative way but you never know what could happen and if you should lose one then you would still have another child.”  My Dad was a thinker and I always thought about that once Kathryn was diagnosed with cancer.  I had let it out of my brain while she was well.  But once she was diagnosed the second time I remembered it and thought about it.  Thinking back on how he said it so caring and loving.  He was an only child.  I think he also didn’t want my child to be an only child.  I think he always wanted a sibling.  He was so right so many times.  He was also so sensitive to Kathryn’s disease.  He came in his wheel chair to visit her when she had her brain surgery in April of 2010.  He hated hospitals but he came to visit because it was Kathryn.  He almost got sick.  The pain he felt for her make him not feel well at all.  It will be one year since my Dad passed away on May 5th.  I’m sure he greeted her with open arms, a big hug and a big kiss.  I miss the hugs and kisses from both of them.  They both loved with so much passion and with everything they had to give.  I think I miss them because they both loved me unconditionally. 

Good Night


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